Romans 5:8–But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
One of our little ones is in the middle of day five in a row of bad-behavior days. I don’t know what triggered this down-cycle and I don’t know how to stop it. I’ve been asking all of her therapists for suggestions or explanations. Each of them has very good advice, which I appreciate very much, but if I were to try all of them it would be a huge undertaking. While driving home from therapy today, I had the thought that in order to keep her happy, well-balanced, and out of fit-pitching mode I would have to be the perfect parent. One who never loses her temper or raises her voice. One who is always patient and willing to teach. One who spends the entire day going from one therapeutic intervention to the next. One who is 100% consistent and never, ever waivers, even when I am tired. That sounds pretty impossible to me, and the thought of even trying to be that kind of person every minute of every day sounds exhausting.
Then I began to think about how God sees me. I am SO glad that God doesn’t require me to be perfect in order to love me! I am SO glad that He is able to be the perfect parent to me that I will never be able to be. I am SO glad that even though I am a sinner His love never changes or waivers. He never grows tired of being my Heavenly Father and He is willing to teach me every moment of every day, if I am willing to learn. He is consistent and never-changing.
As tired as I am, as frustrated as I may be, I am NEVER going to give up on one of my babies. And thankfully, God feels that way about me too. I think He probably gets frustrated with me sometimes when my faith weakens or when I choose the wrong path, but He doesn’t give up on me. And, He has my back, showing me how He wants me to parent by being the perfect model which I can strive to imitate. So, I am taking a step back, a few deep breaths, and diving headfirst back into helping her, and I know God is going with me.